You put in the hours of practice. You’re an accomplished and experienced musician. But somehow you can't ignore the incessant chatter of your mind. What if I mess up? What if they realise I don’t belong here? What if I finally get found out?
Does this sound like you? On the outside, you appear successful, confident and highly capable. But on the inside, you’re full of self-doubt and terrified of getting found out. You feel like a fraud on stage, despite clear evidence of your success. You’re skilled at what you do, yet you fear you might fail. In fact, your critical voice seems to grow the more successful you become. You become expert at hiding what you’re feeling, but what happens when it all becomes too much? What happens when imposter syndrome creates music performance anxiety?
Imposter Syndrome: A Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
As a musician, imposter syndrome is often most prevalent in high-achievers and those in the public eye. It usually goes hand-in-hand with self-doubt, fear of failure and other self-limiting beliefs and behaviours. These tend to play out in either a repressive or reactive way. On the repressive side sits self-doubt – one of imposter syndrome’s most trusted allies. It’s so much a part of imposter syndrome that it can be hard to untangle the two. Forming a toxic partnership, self-doubt helps to validate the existence of its limiting partner by actively seeking the flaws in your competence, your abilities and your performance. It helps to create the very fear you are trying to avoid. It’s desperate to prove you really are an imposter. In this way, a perfect negative spiral is created.
On the reactive side, having imposter syndrome as a musician can push you to overcompensate. You might over-practise, focus only on your weaknesses, over-challenge yourself, push yourself through pain, or be enticed by unhealthy competition. These behaviours can work to a degree, but they cannot be maintained. Inevitably, they usually lead to burnout, fatigue, anxiety and stress. Eventually something has to give.
A Precursor to Music Performance Anxiety
Imposter syndrome thrives on perfectionism and comparison. Striving to be that pianist who never misses a note. Setting yourself impossible standards to live up to flawless recordings. Comparing yourself to the musician who makes even the most complex pieces look effortless. When you measure yourself like this or constantly strive for an unhealthy level of perfection, your mind will negatively respond to that pressure. It will try to backup your belief that you really are an imposter. It will search for all the proof it can to validate your feelings of not being good enough. A single mistake on stage can become confirmation that you’re a fraud. A missed opportunity feels like failure, rather than part of the journey.
Imposter syndrome can be a challenge for many musicians. Left unchecked, it can exacerbate existing music performance anxiety, and even create it. Fear of judgement becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. The very thing you feared might come true. Maybe you really do mess up, let yourself down, or hold yourself back in some way. Deep down you know this isn't an accurate representation of your true capabilities as a musician, but imposter syndrome makes you believe it’s real. Each time you listen to these thoughts, they cement your belief, and this creates your undesired reality. This negative loop is then sealed by the fact that your programmed beliefs will always override the truth unless you challenge them. You are wired to fiercely defend these beliefs, especially if the evidence suggests they are true. Before you know it, you begin to fear the fear itself. So how can you pull yourself out of this negative cycle?
Overcoming Imposter Syndrome as a Musician
The first step to overcoming imposter syndrome as a musician is to look at the beliefs that prop it up. What is it trying to tell you about yourself? Is it trying to prove that you’re not a capable musician, that you don’t deserve success, that you’ll never quite make it, or that you’re skating on thin ice?
Once you have identified your limiting beliefs, question what makes them appear true. Are they an accurate reflection of your true capabilities or can you see them for what they are? They're not facts. They're the product of past experiences - stories you tell yourself, reinforced through past events. Perhaps they came from an innocent comment you misinterpreted, a pushy teacher or parent, or a single moment from years ago which imprinted on your memory. When you don’t question their validity, they become your truth.
The next step is to start consciously recognising all the moments which prove you are not an imposter. There are so many memories your critical mind may have blanked out. Think of all the times you can prove your limiting beliefs to be false. When you achieved something you never thought you could. You succeeded against all odds. You received that recognition or thanks. Remember all the times you touched your audience with the experience of your playing, your passion and your talent.
You Were Never an Imposter
It can be hard to realise that your imposter syndrome was not what you thought. After all, it tricked you into believing it for so long. But what if you could start to see the truth? Unshackling yourself from its grip takes gratitude. Look at how far you have come and what you have already achieved. Have gratitude for being able to do what you love and bring joy to others. Changing your perspective in this way transforms your whole mindset and can be a powerful catalyst for positive change.
When you stop believing your inner voice, you can start to rewire your brain with positive beliefs which support a more capable you. Imagine the new empowering beliefs you can create for yourself. I am a capable musician. I deserve success. I belong on stage. I can achieve anything I put my mind to. What beliefs validate your true talent and capabilities? As you do this, you’ll notice yourself consciously changing your thoughts and actions to align to those new beliefs. You'll start to see the truth. Doubt might still whisper in the background, but it no longer has a hold over you.
So, the next time you step on stage and hear that voice telling you you’re not enough, remember: the real imposter is imposter syndrome itself. And it doesn’t get to have the final say.
Break through imposter syndrome with The Fearless Musician programme. Using the power of hypnosis, I help you overcome music performance anxiety so you can play with greater confidence, freedom and ease. Book a consultation now to start your journey.
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